I have this funny/sad picture in my mind - that I am a little like Gollum from Lord of the Rings (hopefully not that creepy looking - ugh, I had to close my eyes through parts!). Strange, I know, but keep reading. :) The ring is something small and as just a ring (which I realize it's not really just that in the storyline but all analogies break down somewhere...) and yet Gollum strokes it, coddles it, talks to it, etc. I just realized this morning that I am similar. There are things in my life that are very small, fairly incidental, and morally neutral. In and of themselves there is nothing wrong with them, perhaps they could even be considered a good thing. But I am one of an obsessive nature (not a shocker to some of you) and all the sudden this small, insignificant thing becomes huge in my life. I stroke it, coddle it, obsess over it, to the point where it becomes an idol. What a picture of my natural self - that I could so badly twist something like that and it ends up as something that has caused my perspectives to shift and become skewed, taking on a life of its own. How great is the grace that saves someone like me.

A serious, spiritual muse

Lately I have been very acutely aware of how blessed I am by God. Not just blessed as we generally think of the word (material) although that is also the case, but blessed in many, many ways. Most incredible is feeling blessed in my relationship with the Lord - experiencing His "Fatherly-ness" on an almost daily basis - feeling protected, close, aware of His presence. I have seen God time and time again meet every need of mine in the past and present, and it has given me an increasing faith in what John Piper would call "future grace". Nothing has made this more clear to me than the "ever-faith-stretching" support raising. In a very tangible way, I have seen my Father provide time and time again in something that is SO easy for me to worry about and not trust Him with. That tangible provision has opened my eyes to the innumerable ways that He provides in every other avenue of life, in those areas that are little more fuzzy or more difficult to put my finger on. Would my eyes have been opened without that ongoing experiencing? And, how much more they need to be opened yet! I still am so blind to all that God is and does. Our God is amazing isn't he?

As I'm moving, I'm thinking of all that I've learned in the last year and a half here. Living alone has been a challenge at times but it has allowed me the opportunity to more closely rely on God for friendship and so experience deeper intimacy with Him. I find myself praying more often - perhaps because there was less noise, no one else to talk to (as if He should be the last resort?!?), fewer distractions, etc. Being put in places of loneliness for a season are good - they confront me with the fact that human relationships will never fill all my deepest longings. I get fooled too often. I need "lesson one" again and again.

I'm going to bed. I'm tired of packing, boxes, and cleaning. Who's idea was this crazy moving thing anyways?!?

A look inside my fridge

In light of the far-too-quickly-approaching move, I have refused to go to the grocery store and instead, am attempting to eat myself "out of house and home" so to speak. It's been 3 weeks and I have hardly made a dent. It makes me wonder, where does the expression, "I have nothing in the house to eat" come from?!? It's a complete lie. Mind you, I've had some pretty interesting combinations - 2 left over chicken fingers with tuna and carrots. All good on their own....but together?

Am I hording food just in case we go to war? Or maybe for another Y2K non-incident? (Y2K - so funny) I wonder what someone from India or parts of Africa would say when they opened my fridge or cupboards. Or for that matter, one of the many homeless people on our streets here. It kind of makes me sick. We really have no idea how good we have it. Try it one day - see how long you can go without groceries, except maybe a carton of milk to finish off the 3 half boxes of cereal you've had for months.

Tribute to the TY Fam

There is something about being a family together overseas that no matter how many years it's been, things never seem to change - these people plus a few others who weren't at our little reunion this weekend, will always be my "TY fam", some of my favourite people in the world. They definitely make the short list.

When you live together, work together, socialize together, go to school and church together, and are each other's entire lives pretty much, you get to know one another pretty well - the good, the bad, and the ugly (ie. the "bad china days")

So here's to you guys - G-Dog and Peng, Almisnator, Rebeccs, Stitchy, Trails, Bu Hao, Wix, Glo-Bug, and Cher-woa. For those who couldn't be there on Sunday, we missed you!!

My chiropractor is a miracle-worker! Yay for health!

A great weekend, despite the back!

Saturday night was our Toronto wide formal with students from all 3 universities! All done in a Narnia theme - I'm so glad there are some very creative people in life! They did an amazing job!
After that, I drove to Niagara Falls to a brand new 5 star resort. My dad had done some work there and got us some free passes ($400/night value!)!! The place was incredible - it was an indoor waterpark - 3 hot tubs, a wave pool, about 10 water slides that were so amazing! We had a blast!